I realize the title assertion runs counter to the imagery of hardbodies in scant attire flying through the air and diving through the sand. I'm not talking anatomical aesthetics; I'm talking athletic aesthetics. Two-person beach volleyball, sanctioned or not by FIVB, is a travesty, a grossly abridged distortion of the great sport of volleyball.
Off and on, there has been a professional beach volleyball tour in America since 1984. Financial mismanagement is blamed for tour failures in 1998 and 2010. Mismanagement, such as six-figure executive salaries for an undercapitalized league, played a part, no doubt. Small stadiums on sand was called another factor, as it underlined limited popularity of the sport to casual TV viewers. Of course, large temporary bleachers could not be safely constructed on loose sand. Thus, indoor sand volleyball is trying to gain traction.
Really? Has anybody considered that the sport as a sport (and not as a festival-carnival event with free-flowing alcohol) is just not that interesting? Of course, there have been and continue to be great athletes involved with the competition. Names like Kiraly, Stoklos, Smith, Dodd, May-Traynor, and Walsh are "legendary" among true believers. However, how popular would Michael Jordan and Magic Johnson have become if all they played was two-on-two half-court basketball? There is a reason two-on-two or three-on-three hoops has not caught on as a major spectator sport. It's just not interesting or fun to watch! It's an abomination of the great game of basketball.
Funny thing, though. Two-person sand volleyball became a medal sport at the 1996 Summer Olympics, thereby legitimizing the "sport" in the eyes of many. Uh-huh. To many purists, two-person volleyball remains a recreation and not a sport. It's like setting up a bleacher around a batting cage and watching Prince Fielder take several swings. Zzzzzzzz. Let's see, where's the setter? On this play, Player A is the setter. Who will Player A pass it to? Let's see. Player B?
What else is boring about the "sport"? Hint: try watching Nadal in an early-round match at Wimbledon. He serves, he scores. He serves, he scores. He serves, he faults. He serves, he scores. Zzzzzzz. Two-person beach volleyball de-emphasizes finesse, defense, and strategy. It focuses on the serve and the spike. He attacks, he scores. He attacks, he scores. He attacks, he faults. He attacks, he scores.
Sure, there are exceptions. And there are the colorful "uniforms."
What else is unappealing about sand volleyball? They play in the sand! That's fun in casual parties and with family, not as formal competition maximizing skills of players. One moves slower in sand. Quick is less quick. Lateral movement becomes glacial. Would you like to watch Michael Jordan play basketball in a sandbox? Zzzzzzz. Also, hops are huge in volleyball. One does not jump as high off sand as off a hardwood court. Again, beach volleyball reduces the game's aesthetic.
For about half of the '90s, a four-person sand volleyball league flourished. As a hybrid, the small league was far more interesting as athletic competition. Alas, it floundered and closed shop in 1998.
I do hope the NCAA and other athletic organizations think twice before diving headlong into establishing sand volleyball as an intercollegiate sport. How about focusing on promoting the popularity of the real six-person indoor game first for both men and women?
The NCAA should realize that beach volleyball was added as an Olympic sport for two reasons. First, the power and influence at the time of the USOC and American television networks pressed for inclusion of new events which Americans were good at. Why? Gold medals boosted TV ratings and TV ratings boosted ad revenues. Second, Europeans love any athletic events where clothing, if not optional, is kept to a minimum.
Therefore, the NCAA should realize the truth: two-person sand volleyball is ugly.
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